The paradox of the 21st century is that man-made technologies are advancing faster than man can digest. Not all consumers have yet managed to buy or use the IPhone 6 to the point of boredom, as the new IPhone 6S model is already entering the market. So it is with information, politics, fashion, life priorities, social phenomena – everything. “To keep up with the times” – so they used to say about modern man. Now the world is moving faster than the speed of an individual. From everywhere we are covered by a huge flow of information – we need to keep up, digest, comply, be in the “trend”, change and change.
Relationships for fun?
Of course, I would like that at such a speed of life, at least something in it would be easier. Unfortunately, we have chosen this simplicity in the relationship. SMS dating, tinders, top faces, all social networks – meeting each other on the one hand has become easier. You no longer need to spend weeks waiting for an envelope in the mailbox or look for 2 kopecks to call from a pay phone. And on the other hand, we stopped looking for each other, we stopped seeing and hearing each other, we stopped cherishing the person in our life.
We do not waste time to get to know each other, achieve, like, prove that we are the best. At the slightest misunderstanding, we press the “Block” button or add the number to the “Black” list. We have no time to explain, bother, strain. May God remember all the names and some details about new acquaintances who are already waiting for us online.
Relationships in the style of “easier” are relationships for fun. We are looking for a couple for a night, a day, a week. But even if this week flies by coolly, brightly, dynamically, if it turns out to be fun, sincere, warm together with a random acquaintance … We say “Bye” after the expiration of the designated period. Or we don’t say, as if holding the person you like in case you want to have fun again and if there is free time for this. But we don’t want to develop anything. After all, it involves effort. And I want to live “easier”. Don’t stress, because we already spend so much time to be successful, to earn a lot of money, to buy ourselves a bunch of unnecessary things. At the same time, we cry to girlfriends or friends that we are lonely, there is no “own” person, we want love so much. But where will love come from if all our doors are closed? Sometimes prostitutes say that men pay them money not for sex, but just to talk, or so that she cooks borscht for him, or reads a book.
People are willing to pay for hugs
I once read that Cuddleuptome, a hugging shop, had opened in the US city of Portland. For $60, the client is offered a whole hour of platonic hugs. There is no end to those who wish. People pay money and go somewhere just to be hugged, to sit with them, someone asks not even so much hugs, but, for example, to sit next to them and do something together. After all, even cats do not tolerate the lack of tactile contacts. Any cat owner will tell how his pet climbs onto his arms at least once a day and climbs off them, only having received the right portion of bodily warmth.
And how to live without the warmth of the soul? Without someone who will make you coffee without asking how much sugar to put in it, because he knows for a long time what kind of coffee you like. Without someone who will understand that you are tired, barely looking at your face. Without someone who remembers your birthday, even when you yourself forgot about it. Without someone who, having shared a single piece of cake, will push you the most.
I don’t want an iPhone 6S, and I didn’t want all 5 previous ones either. Although it may be the only thing that our descendants will find in our tombs. Because we will not survive, we are decay, but the iPhone 6S is made of plastic and metal. And Apple is already working on a self-healing material for the case. Soon it will be impossible to leave scratches on it, they will self-level. It doesn’t work that way with a heart. It always leaves scars if you don’t live “easier”. But those who are not afraid of these scars do not need to pay 60 dollars for hugs. Live hard. Hug for free.
Author: Elena Shpundra, psychologist, journalist, traveler
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