Adherents of free love argue that cheating is just nonsense, so it’s stupid to be jealous of a partner. I so want to agree with them, but … It is worth noting that your beloved pays too much attention to the other, as the owner instantly wakes up in you.
Admittedly, serious relationships almost never do without jealousy. But is it necessary to suppress this painful feeling in yourself? Or is it, like a litmus test, helps to detect problems in the family?
Dangerous game of feelings
Everyday routine and the feeling of “groundhog day” cause a natural desire to somehow cheer up, get at least a small dose of adrenaline. One of the simplest and favorite female ways is to start a quarrel with a loved one. Here you don’t need to do anything special: make a claim – and get your charge of vivacity!
And the husband’s accusations of infidelity or increased interest in other women are best suited for this. Indeed, in contrast to reproaches of mismanagement or laziness, this topic is characterized by both drama and the manifestation of high feelings.
Perhaps, in small doses, such a “medicine” allows you to maintain passion in a relationship. After all, being jealous, you thereby, as it were, emphasize how dear a man is to you.
However, if you constantly show suspicion, sooner or later your loved one will have an “overdose”. He will begin to move away, resisting total control. As a result, betrayal will cease to be a topic for hypothetical reasoning and will turn into reality.
Trust but verify
It happens that with his careless jokes or actions, a man himself provokes his beloved to attacks of jealousy. Generous compliments to your wife’s friends and your employees, a wink at a saleswoman or a cute waitress – all this can overwhelm a woman’s patience.
But you should remember that loud scenes of jealousy are not always able to change the behavior of a man. If the craving for beauty makes him show signs of attention to almost every second woman, he is unlikely to be able to suppress her by an effort of will.
In such a situation, replicated recommendations like “get a new haircut” or “put on seductive lingerie” can work. This type of men actively reacts to novelty, so you have every chance to distract your loved one from contemplating other representatives of the weaker sex.
Old sins resurface
If a man once cheated, then it is difficult to call the suspicions of his wife empty speculation. But still, a woman must remember: if she did not part with him, forgave infidelity, then now she needs to find the strength in herself to believe in her husband’s sincere desire to make amends.
To distract from unhappy thoughts, focus on those actions and words of a man that testify to his love and fidelity. Praise him for any manifestations of care, from the garbage he took out to the brewed coffee. Thus, you will cause a kind of chain reaction: a man, seeing a smile on your face, hearing words of gratitude for small signs of attention, will want to please you as often as possible. After all, as it turned out, it is quite easy!
If you assign him the role of eternally guilty, constantly frown and look at him suspiciously, he will not last long in this role … and in your house.
Mirror of Self-Esteem
And sometimes the reason for jealousy is a woman’s insecurity in herself. If you consider yourself not beautiful enough, slender, interesting enough to be a worthy match for your man, then he has to not only constantly swear allegiance, but also raise your self-esteem. “Darling, you are my smart one! No, I don’t need any secretary!” This can quickly get boring for him. In the end, if a woman calls herself an idiot or a fat cow, then he willy-nilly begins to believe her – and look towards others.
If you are prone to self-flagellation, learn to bite your tongue every time you feel like criticizing yourself. And don’t torment your husband with questions: “Do you really love me and will you never leave me?” Act like it’s obvious. So you and the husband in it will convince.