1. “Chemistry” between partners on a first date is required
The common myth about halves is to blame for everything: they say, you will see the one who is destined for you – and you will immediately realize everything. If in three seconds it was not possible to understand whether you are ready to spend your whole life with this person or not, then there is no point in meeting further.
In fact, such a development of events is not excluded, but it is not necessary at all. There are people with whom we have the same interests, life goals, thoughts about the future. But in order to be sure of this, we need to communicate. And at first glance, you can only evaluate the appearance, so the notorious “spark”, in general, does not mean anything.
Of course, if a person is categorically unpleasant, this is significant. But if you generally like him, then you should not deprive yourself of the opportunity to get to know him better because of mythology and stereotypes.
2. A man should pay for everything
This thesis is taken as seriously as if it was stuffed on the tablets of Moses in small print at number 11. In fact, these are social “dances” that succeed if both partners dance them. That is, both a man and a woman must be firmly convinced that this is how it works and means something.
The belief itself refers to those times when a woman, in essence, had nothing to pay. If she worked, she didn’t get much, because her entire “career” was about waiting for marriage. She didn’t have personal money from this, but it seemed like her husband had to support his family.
Times have changed. Women work and are able to pay everywhere on their own. The fact that a man pays for two is an element of courtship, no more, like many other gestures and actions. But it is unlikely that you have heard something like: “He went up the stairs in front of me, I don’t want to see him again.” But with the bill for a cup of coffee, such a story is all the time.
Although if the date is one of the first, it is still an acquaintance, not courtship. In addition, now, thanks to the Internet, an adult can go on first dates several times a week – you won’t pay for everyone. And it’s not so much about money, but about common sense.
However, if you think otherwise, then why not. Dates exist for this, to find out if the views on life coincide. If this is not so, it does not mean that the person is bad, it’s just that you are different.
3. Sex – on the third date
Normal sexual relations are established when both partners want it and both agree. Man is a very complex being, which is affected not only by biological, but also by social mechanisms. And therefore, someone is ready for sex already on the first date, and someone, by virtue of conviction, will wait until the wedding.
All options are normal, this is the choice of a person who does not harm anyone. So it remains only to look for someone whose aspirations coincide with yours.
4. A date without flowers is not a date.
Bouquets are considered a mandatory attribute of courtship, but they are not always. Firstly, not everyone likes cut flowers and even flowers in general. Secondly, people have different kinds of allergies, and an unfamiliar donor may not be aware of this. Thirdly, a bouquet can bring a lot of inconvenience on a date: how to carry it on a walk, where to put it in a cafe, where to place it if it is a karting center.
So the bouquet is not the default option. If you want to do something pleasant in this way, you should first find out if it will really be pleasant.
5. You need to show only your best sides.
This is inevitable: when we meet new people, we try to present them with the best version of ourselves. But you should not be too zealous. Because if the relationship develops, wearing a mask for the rest of your life or communication will not work. As a result, sooner or later you will appear before your partner as a different person, and not the one he fell in love with.
Of course, there is no need to rush and release all your cockroaches on the first date, but you can already “walk” them one by one. In the end, harmonious relationships are built not by ideal people, but by those who coincide with each other. So it is better to start looking for common ground right away.
6. A woman should be impregnable, and a man – mysterious
Here you can substitute any stereotypical definitions that society has a car for each gender. And most likely, living up to common expectations will actually help you please more people. But does it make sense if in the end you need one single person who will fall in love with you, and not the stereotypical tinsel.
Moreover, all sorts of features will become “face control” and even on the approach they will cut off those for whom there is no need to waste time.
7. A date with an online acquaintance is not real.
A significant part of life has moved to the Internet. But people are still suspicious relate to online dating. Therefore, if you met with friends, at intellectual games, in a bar or on the street, then this is a serious date. And if through the Internet, then nothing good will come of it.
This is, of course, a myth. The Internet is just another channel of communication, where there are nice people and unpleasant people – everything is like in life. And many find their soul mates on the Web, for example, the heroes of our material on online dating.