Psychological traumas received in early childhood often interfere with us for many years in adulthood. But we ourselves may not even be aware of it.
Even understanding what and when went wrong, we consciously avoid these memories: why touch a sore spot? But psychologists and psychotherapists think otherwise. According to experts, awareness and acceptance of existing problems is an inevitable path if you want to live a full life.
Why do therapists advise you to relive trauma?
In fact, all psychotherapy is the path of honesty.
With small steps, movements of the soul that destroy illusions, go to the reality called integrity.
Integrity is when the picture is assembled. And everything that was previously rejected is accepted.
And along this path, you can suddenly discover a lot of new things. A person who for decades did not dare to approach the fact “I am an unloved child”, but finally survived this, suddenly, with boundless surprise, discovers for himself the depth of his partner’s feelings: “But he told me LOVES! The way I always wanted, but I expected it from the other side – in the past, from my parents. It turns out that all this was next to me … And I kept looking into the past.
But it happens otherwise.
Sometimes the acceptance and understanding of past problems leads to the fact that the current life can appear in a very unfavorable light. In such cases, people can find out something not very pleasant about themselves and loved ones.
Often there are confessions like: “I realized that with my wife the same story as with my mother – she clings to me like ivy to a fence. But he doesn’t see me. The same little girl, preoccupied with herself.
Thus, another disappointment arises. But this is parting with the illusion. One clarity gives birth to the next, they are different and not always pleasant.
Clarity – it is so, not always pleasant – why they run away from it for years. But honest. And like a solid bottom from which you can push off in order to emerge from the muddy cauldron of experiences to light and air.