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What is neglect
Neglect (from the English “neglect”) is a form of psychological abuse in which a person systematically ignores the vital needs of the dependent victim.
In Europe and the US, the term is usually used in the context of nursing. for children or incapacitated people – Seriously ill or with limited mobility.
In recent years, the concept of neglekt has expanded, because not only the most vulnerable people can become its victims.
How to recognize neglect
People who find themselves in a vulnerable position usually receive support from those around them. For example, a sick person may expect a husband or wife to make lemon tea, go grocery shopping, and babysit.
But with a neglect, the desires of the sick person will be systematically ignored. If a partner forgets about the need to help 1-2 times, this can be a simple inattention. If he does this constantly and never corrects, this is psychological abuse. It is the systematic and unwillingness to change that gives neglect.
At the same time, it can manifest itself not only in relationships within the family, but also at work or, for example, in a hospital. So, the head may fundamentally not provide sick leave, and the staff of the medical institution may ignore the requests of the patient.
In specific cases, neglect manifests itself in different ways depending on the relationship between the victim and the abuser:
- Parents do not care about their children, ignore their requests. In such a situation, the child may come to school dirty, dressed inappropriately for the weather, and not receive the necessary medical care.
- Likewise, the negglecter is oblivious to the needs of an elderly relative who is unable to provide for himself. For example, not cleaning the room, refusing medicines and not maintaining hygiene.
- Neglekter will not help a sick loved one and will not take over any household chores.
- The husband basically does not help his wife around the house, although he expects her to work and earn at least on a par with him. After the birth of a common child, he completely shifts the care of the baby to his wife. Let’s say he moves to another room to sleep.
- The head of the family single-handedly makes decisions that concern all its members, and is in full control of the budget. The desires and needs of dependent people are not taken into account.
What forms can neglect take?
His probation share into several basic types.
- Physical. In this case, the vulnerable person’s needs for food, hygiene, medicine, sleep, rest, and seasonal clothing and footwear are ignored.
- Emotional. It consists in refusing to respect the feelings and experiences of the victim. One partner will not listen to the other, will not support in emotionally difficult situations.
- Financial. Neglekter will not buy beautiful pencils for children, but will offer to draw with the cheapest ones. Or he won’t buy a washing machine, because he can wash it with his hands.
- Educational. It can concern both children who are not allowed to school, and adults. For example, when a husband demands that his wife drop out of school for the sake of the household.
- Social. Associated with the abuse of his position. So, the doctor will refuse pain relief to the patient, and the official will ignore all the visitors to drink the tenth mug of tea.
- Self-inglect. This is self-loathing. A person can work too hard and deny himself proper sleep and rest, save money and wear one thing for years or go to doctors when a health problem can no longer be ignored.
What is dangerous neglect
Systematic neglect destroys the identity of the victim. Her desires and needs are constantly ignored, and gradually she begins to consider herself a burden and her life meaningless. As a result, self-esteem is rapidly falling, anxiety is increasing, depression, addictions and other mental disorders may develop.
Neglect has even more serious consequences. For example, refusing to care for and buy medicines in the case of a sick person can even lead to death.
What to do if you think you’re in trouble
There is a general advice for all types of violence: try to stop the traumatic situation as soon as possible or get out of it.
For example, when it comes to social negligence, you can file a complaint against a specific specialist, write about the incident on social networks to draw attention to the problem, or, in the end, contact another official or doctor.
When the victim does not have the ability to stop the violence, that is, the neglect concerns children or helpless people, social instruments play an important role. In the event of apparent neglect of children, outside adults, such as a school teacher or kindergarten teacher, can and should contact the police or guardianship authorities. In the same way, the participation of those who care is important for helping disabled people.
When a neglector is one of the spouses, everything is also not easy. It can be difficult for victims to admit that they were betrayed by the closest person, and society often takes the side of the aggressor. People can convince: “Everyone lives like this and nothing, they don’t complain.” Or even be indignant: “He already supports you, he cares for you anyway, but no, give you more!”
There is only one solution to the problem – to stop depending on the neglekter and try to end this relationship.
To do this, you should seek help from the family or start saving money in a personal account in order to create a “safety cushion”. You can also look for support from caring friends, colleagues, neighbors. They are able to give useful advice or help you get out of a dependent relationship step by step.
As a last resort, it makes sense to find the contacts of the local center for assistance to victims of violence and contact the staff. In such organizations there are psychologists and lawyers who will tell you how best to act in a particular case.