Romance is like old lace: beautiful, but… Somehow impractical and seemingly useless. However, it is worth “trying on” it – and you will be convinced: your relationship will change for the better! Do you want to know why?
“Romance is a state of inspiration,” explains French psychologist Maryse Vaillant. – A man and a woman try to give each other the best, to show their “I” openly and as fully as possible. In romantic relationships, we are as vulnerable and open as we are courageous and fearless. That is why we remember the romantic period of our love with such pleasure. If it wasn’t there, the couple is more likely to break up in the future.” But even in a mature happy relationship, a drop of romance, according to psychologists, will help …
1. Become more confident in relationships
We believe that romance is something completely elusive, at the level of sensations and experiences … But the neurosis of relationships is a very specific thing. It affects up to 50% of young people. Symptoms – doubts about the correct choice of a partner, thoughts: “Is it worth changing something?” The setting “there will be a new meeting after parting” gives a feeling of freedom, but increases anxiety: what if the partner thinks the same way, and then what is the point in all this? There is tension and fear. In an effort to gain confidence, we strengthen our material positions. But this raises even more suspicion. Only romance will fix the situation! You have to look at your partner and think that fate brought you together, regardless of the circumstances of your acquaintance. Even if it was a social network or a neighbor who decided to put her nephew in (“Good guy, but he works hard, there is no time to get to know each other”), you were still connected there, upstairs. It was the stars who decided that you would be together forever. The predetermination of the meeting is the basis of a sense of harmony in relationships. Therefore, keep romantic memories of meeting your loved one and “revive” them from time to time.
2. Feel happier
Happiness is elusive just like romance. And so they are always there. “Well, it’s time for us to formalize the relationship. Let’s decide what day and let the parents know. Are you not happy?” The vast majority of women will find such an offer terrible. But what about beautiful memories and a feeling of something extraordinary?! We need all this to be happy. And not only at the beginning of a relationship, but throughout life. So give each other unexpected gifts. Leave cute notes, walk hand in hand. React enthusiastically to his surprises – so that you want to repeat them again and again. Romance improves the quality of life. And gives us a constant source of joy.
3. Get it right
Is there something in the partner that gets on your nerves, but he does not want to understand and correct it? Civilized conflict is impossible here. It’s like with an overflowing dam: irritation accumulates, accumulates, then overflows and drowns everything around. Such quarrels are dangerous – under the influence of emotions, you can say things that you will regret. Metaphors, comparisons and allegory are capable of making a speech romantic and, therefore, intelligible, and a partner more understandable. Unexpected turns of speech attract attention, help to look at the situation in a new way, to rethink it. Even an unfortunate comparison (“We are like a seagull and a stone.” – Why is that ?! – “How do I know, it just came to my mind”) can be useful: it will improve mood and provide an opportunity to be distracted. But about the dam, the metaphor is quite accurate to explain your anger.
Do you want to know how to be happier? Look:
Author: Lisa Women’s magazine