The invasion began imperceptibly – with a toothbrush. And, indeed, it is logical and convenient to have a toothbrush where you start a new day. Do not carry it with you in a bag. And what is a toothbrush? In which case, I threw it away – out of sight, out of mind. So at first I didn’t suspect anything.
The cats only sneered contemptuously – “well, yes, we saw it” – and went home, to lie down on their sides in long-distributed places.
These places were exclusively in the center of the apartment. Just in case, to demonstrate to the newcomer who is the boss in the house. Only cats know how to lie like that. It seems to be in a deep sleep and complete relaxation, but with an invisible sign “This is a beloved cat, and this is a favorite sofa of a beloved cat, so, brother, no chance.”
Some time later, while hanging clothes on the balcony, I found panties in funny dogs and with Merry Christmas inscriptions. The panties were clearly not mine. The dogs grinned wickedly at them.
The cats were sleeping. The man was preparing food. Do not burst into the kitchen with a scandal and destroy this whole idyll.
Later, in my beautiful micro socks, I began to find fins or felt boots. The objects of the proud male declaration I love sport or Underwear were added to the dogs.
Only on men’s shorts you can find a huge inscription “underwear” all over the elastic band, as if someone would confuse them with shorts. And only a man can wear themed Christmas shorts at any time of the year.
But having accepted the dogs, it was already somehow difficult to refuse the sport. Yes, and in the bins of the closet, I found last year’s Santa Claus hat. We are ready for Christmas, I thought. The expansion continued.
Soon the phrases “let’s go eat”, “what do we have to eat?” began to follow me at any time of the day or night.
The cats revived. My refrigerator also bloomed with different colors and smells. Cottage cheese and diet soup were pushed to the farthest shelves.
“Meat,” said the man. “Meat,” the cats meowed.
From now on, they were no longer looking at me, waiting for their granular rations.
“Brother, well, we are of the same blood, this bacon is quite okay, but you can give us more cheese, so be it, we will move on the couch. What else do you eat there? Chicken? Come on, brother, share.”
So a coalition quickly formed in my house. And I, with my diet soup and granular cat treats, was clearly in the minority.
They ate together. They slept together. On the balcony, the wind stirred the hymn to sports, cheerful Christmas dogs and socks that looked more like a scarf.
Another toothbrush in the bathroom. Refrigerator full of food. Snoring of three noses. “Let’s go eat” said by a man at 6 am.
“Come on, great idea” said by two cats. And sleepy me, who did not have time to notice how life has changed.