The time has passed when the girls, wringing their hands, repeated: oh, the real men on earth ended, everyone was gone. And then passed (we hope) the time when you were ready to break into a cake in the courses “Goddess of Femininity in 7 Days”. How is it worth building relationships today?
Let’s start from the simple truth that relationships are always work, and both parties should always be interested in it. Therefore, the tips and tricks that Lisa will talk about in this article are not dogmas that every girl must follow, “otherwise they won’t marry.”
This is your part of the responsibility that is worth taking on in order to create an attentive and loving couple.
1. Admire and praise
A person is arranged in such a way that, even if he perfectly understands how false praise is, he is usually still pleased to listen. And here we are talking about your favorite. One hundred percent you will find something to praise him for without embellishing reality!
By the way, you need to do this regularly. Remember, as a teenager, you missed a simple “I love you” from relatives and friends? You suffered, then grew up and realized: they loved you, of course, they just didn’t say. But at that moment you sincerely doubted it!
Now put yourself in your man’s shoes. What does he usually hear from you? If only comments, when something is wrong (and when everything is fine, you don’t need to say so, it goes without saying!), Then it’s urgently time to change the approach.
2. Don’t give advice
You and he are very different. These are not beautiful words, this is a medically proven fact. And if you are used to giving advice to your friends, with a man – especially with your own! – it’s better not to do that.
For him, your constant advice, which he did not ask for, sounds like this: “I doubt that you can handle it on your own, so I’m already starting to help you.” Do not hesitate – and he will cope.
3. Do not be offended by misunderstanding
And once again: you and he are arranged very differently. And you, too, can get from him not what you expect.
A classic example from psychology textbooks: you come to your man in tears, talk about a problem and get 10 wise advice and an action plan to solve it. Your heart gets even worse, and you think: “He never understood me.”
How it works: if a man is presented with a problem, he hears: “Please solve it soon!” And you meant something else: “Please have pity and comfort me,” for example.
So if you want understanding, do not be offended – just speak as directly and clearly as possible about what you expect from him.
4. Don’t be his mom
If you are overprotective of him, he will gladly recognize you as a mommy. You will dress him, feed him and take care of him.
And then one fine day your boy will grow up, find a girl of his psychological age and leave “mother’s” warm house. So, if possible, curb the maternal instinct in relationships.
5. Don’t eat his brain
Lovers of “drip on the brain” and “saw” – the heroine of the favorite male jokes and anecdotes. But you’re a smart girl and you know it doesn’t work. If a man said that he would make a shelf for you tomorrow, then he will do it tomorrow, and you don’t have to ask again every day!
And how then to live with him? Nailing the shelves yourself is an option even worse than sawing your loved one, because who needs two men in the same house?
The most rational option is to try psychological techniques without direct aggression. You need your sweetheart to sharpen his knives and he’s been forgetting about it for three weeks now? Once ask him to cook a salad in your absence.
And you will find out that men are excellent at solving those everyday problems that they have to face on their own.
This is because they are the strongest and smartest. 🙂