Well-known TV presenter, writer and author of psychological trainings, professor of psychology Pavel Rakov continues to share his views on relationships with Liza.ua. Whether to follow his advice is up to you. But to know the male point of view on this issue will clearly be useful!
How to make a man remember you and always remain the most desirable? How not to lose passion in a relationship? This and much more – in the new article.
How to grab attention from the first meeting
Most importantly, this requires a certain courage, creativity and courage. It is important to constantly come up with something new, unusual, to please a loved one, to create a holiday with or without a reason.
The first thing to do – create bright, positive emotions and experiences. I know that some successful couples organize their weddings under water, skydiving together, dinners in a completely dark room, skiing and other extreme sports.
At the beginning of building relationships, it is you who needs to “prepare” bright dates, unexpected, creative, funny. Do not wait for the partner to create romance, but actively fall in love with him and make him fall in love with you. Make it so that you are remembered by him, stand out from several fans.
Now all dates are similar to each other – cinema, cafe, disco. It is necessary: to run on rooftops, walk barefoot through puddles, give flowers to strangers, buy a kilogram of oranges and walk together feeding passers-by with slices, handing out money to passers-by, or other bright good deeds. Go to an art class, a water park, or an ice skating rink together (especially if you can’t skate).
You will remember a non-standard trip to a restaurant – where everyone is sitting on the floor or where it is dark, where you can only eat with your hands or feed each other … During a date, you can tell what cities you have been to, what you love, where you dream to visit.
This will please and be remembered very much, because the standard set of questions – where you were born, when you got married, what job do you work with – is boring and plastic. Everyone is tired of it for a long time.
All dates should be different. If you want to please and get married, or live happily ever after, it is important to create the habit of arranging a holiday, constantly invigorating each other, surrounding yourself with bright events.
Why positive emotions are important for relationships
The point of all this is that the person who is near at the moment of positive emotions is remembered for you. There is a kind of pleasant affection for him, there is joy when you see him. It’s like the “Pavlov’s dog” effect. Remember the experiment: the light bulb lights up, the bell sounds and the dog is given food? Pavlov did this for several weeks, and then the light came on, the bell sounded – but there was no food, and the dog was happy and salivated. This is the positive habit of responding to the signal.
And it’s the same here the task is to cause a spontaneous positive reaction of your partner to you. He sees you – he rejoices, feels good, waits for a date and thinks only of you … And for this you must first invest in relationships: strength, time and sometimes even money, creativity and your own efforts.
Here we must talk about a fine line, because if each date is a bright, unforgettable event, then there will be an “overdose”, i.e. bust and burnout of emotions. Those. these bright events do not need to be arranged on every date, it is enough to do something unexpected after one or two ordinary dates.
If you are married, then you can revive the relationship at homewhen you creatively meet your husband from work. You can call friends, dance a dance for a man, wash his feet in a bowl of rose petals. To say that you are in such a mood today and because “you are a woman” you will be forgiven for this. This will shock the man and greatly delight.
On the other hand, you should always “run away” from your man when he feels bad. Most women will look surprised when reading these lines. But you need to do it this way … Believe me, this has been tested on thousands of men and hundreds of thousands of women.
So that a man does not cause unconscious negative reactions to the appearance of a woman. A man sometimes needs to be alone to recuperate. And a woman, on the contrary, in order to cheer up and restore strength, she wants to share emotions with her friends, chat to relieve tension and stress. So there is a double effect here.
A man came home from work tired, and here is a woman with bright super-mega emotions. On the contrary, it can be pushed away or irritated. In many cases, it is better not to try to make a sharp positive out of a depressed state of a man, in a short time. We change the strategy: let him rest, stay alone, return to normal, calm down, and at this time you and your girlfriend will joyfully go to ballet, cinema, manicure, for your women’s affairs and so that he does not see you at all.
Bottom line: when a pleasant bright event – you are always thereif the event is bright negative and you are nearby, then everything will be bad, love will end very quickly. A man will subconsciously avoid this woman who was there at a difficult moment. If you have a bright pleasant event – you need to be together. At the moment of his triumph, joy, victory (he earned a lot of money, was promoted at work, something pleasant happened), you should always be close to your man!
You help him to rejoice, squeal with delight, wave your arms, jump up and down, smile, act like a complete fool… Then a man, at the sight of this woman, will unconsciously always experience only positive emotions.
Intrigue is a woman’s best weapon
Try a few dates in an unusual place. On the roof of the house or in the pool. You agree in advance, blindfold your companion, say that you have a surprise for him, put him in a taxi, bring him to the place, and there the girlfriends or staff have already prepared everything, lit candles, inflated balloons …
I know girls who dressed themselves in an expensive restaurant with mouse or bunny ears, and gave the man a carrot 🙂 They organized themed parties in the style of the Indians or came in different looks: either a strict business suit, or a frank sexy outfit, changed hairstyles and their behavior. With such a woman, a man is always interested, he is in anticipation of a new meeting, from work he strives to go home or to you on a date … because he never knows who will meet him today. Intrigue is a woman’s best weapon.
If you need new ideas or like-minded people who share ideas for unusual dates – visit our siteask questions – we will be happy to help you 🙂 Or come to our author’s meetings – we play many ways of dating and dating right in the hall, watch how men react, and train what to say, how to answer his tricky questions, how to captivate, delight, seduce and keep his interest.