If we start office romances on the principle of efficient use of time, because work is a place where we spend most of the day, then resort romances happen on the principle of compensatory. A vacation is a long-awaited opportunity to get out of the work routine, relax and allow yourself everything that in the daily hustle and bustle there is neither time nor energy. In other words, we want to break away. Not only in food and drink, choosing your all-inclusive packages. First of all, we want to have an adventure. After all, it is the memories of them that will help us brighten up the dullness of everyday life. And stretch until the next vacation.
It doesn’t matter whether it’s on the seashore, in the mountains on skis or in a house in the countryside. It is important that we relax, become more open, more light, more fun, more generous. And that means we make contact easier. Acquaintances, which in everyday life we either avoid altogether, or enter into them slowly and carefully, are quickly and easily tied up on vacation. We happily communicate with strangers, as if we have known them all our lives, exchange contacts, go to a meeting. Of course, feelings envelop us just as soon.
An indisputable plus of a holiday romance is speed and ease
More brightness. After all, a holiday romance is part of a rare and long-awaited vacation, we don’t want to spend it the way we do acquaintances and dates on weekdays: looking closely, bowing ceremoniously, “so many meetings before “you”, “so many meetings before the first sex” . There is no time for a ceremony on vacation. Because there is not enough time for vacation. Vacation days are compressed into hours. An hour later to “you”, after two – along the beach by the hand, after four – “are we going to you or to me?”. And then I want to spend the remaining time so that there are even more memories. And we do our best to make memories vivid.
The “fellow traveler effect” adds brightness to the holiday romance, when we tell and reveal more to random people in a train compartment or in a waiting room at an airport than to a person with whom we have lived for twenty years. Because we will never see a fellow traveler. He will not judge us, he will not be offended, he will not be angry. And even if so, then he will have very little time to express all these feelings and thoughts. And the one with whom he has been together for twenty years can use the other twenty to reproach “do you remember, you told me then.” In the holiday romance, both are “fellow travelers” for each other. So you can be frank, boldly express feelings, try some novelties in sex that you do not dare to bring into everyday life.
Vacation ends. We are returning to our normal lives. Is it possible to transfer resort relations to them? You can, but it doesn’t happen often. And it’s better not to fantasize about it in advance
See also: Office romance: can he become happy?
How about a sequel?
Do not leave after a vacation with the idea “I found that one forever”, otherwise a pleasant holiday romance can become dramatic. How to understand whether resort relations are developing outside the resort? Probably not so much from the contacts with the partner themselves, but from their depth.
Some time after the vacation, against the backdrop of a powerful charge of positive, eroticism and romance, communication can continue. But that doesn’t mean anything. Says the essence of this communication. If, calling up, you only remember what happened, then most likely, these are just echoes of the past, and not the beginning of the future
In the past, you were good, and these memories adorn the present. But if neither you nor your partner are interested in each other’s real, then, most likely, the relationship will soon come to naught. If reality is more and more woven into your communication, moreover, it takes the form of planning for the future – new meetings, more intense communication, getting to know each other’s friends and relatives – this is a good sign. Maybe you really found your match.
Next should be new meetings. If you live in the same city, they simply must be. If you live in different cities and even countries, you can still plan visits. If there are no meetings, there is only talk about them, then the continuation of the holiday romance turned out to be an illusion.
Illusions allow us to escape from reality for a while, but the main thing is not to run away from it far and for a very long time.
What distinguishes a mentally healthy person from a mentally ill person is, first of all, an adequate idea of reality and of oneself in reality. We start holiday romances to make life brighter, and not to run away from it into illness. Let’s be realistic. And we will be healthy.