The good news is you finally got rid of it. Bad news: he loosened his tongue and gossips about you. What to do?
What to do if the ex-boyfriend turned into a dirty liar and began to spread untrue rumors about you? Spread rumors back? Get rid of it without noise and dust? Turn to otherworldly forces?
Not! Let’s solve problems in an adult way and get out of this situation beautifully.
Take a time out
Despite the fact that you want to immediately come to him and beat him hard, you should take a break and look at the situation differently, think over a strategy of behavior and understand how you feel at the moment.
It’s normal to feel bad emotions. If you are angry, offended or devastated, you want to cry or scream – this is normal.
But a time-out is needed in order to think about and feel your negative emotions. You should not suppress them in yourself and hold back: stay alone with yourself, shout out, beat the pillow, and then look from a different situation.
Here are some useful thoughts for reflection:
- You would never do that to him.
- He does it because he cares about you.
- It’s good that you don’t date such a vile person anymore.
Supplement it with your useful thoughts and do auto-training. Calmness and a cold mind are the main helpers in such situations.
What threatens you?
When you calmed down and felt all the emotions, and also looked at the situation differently, it’s time to deal with gossip and think about it carefully.
Yes, your ex is talking nasty things about you. But will it matter in a month? And after six months? And in a year? If you understand that after a month or two the hype will subside, and everyone will discuss the video with the dog that says “I love you”, boldly let go of all these nasty things.
However, if the ex is trying to ruin your reputation, quarrel with colleagues or friends, you should act ruthlessly.
What to do about gossip
Well, it’s time to act! Act harshly, uncompromisingly and ruthlessly.
The main thingA: It’s not your fault in this situation. And, as they say, you can’t throw a scarf on someone else’s mouth.
- Text your ex and ask them to stop. Cursing is optional, just say that you know that gossip is his dirty hands. If he does not stop, but only continues everything, block ruthlessly and explain the circumstances to the closest.
- Do not try to explain yourself to everyone at once, do not try to refute gossip. Catering to public opinion is a so-so idea that never ends well. Gossip is a web. The more you kick, the more you get confused.
- Ask for help and support. Reach out to friends and family for help. If everything is very sad – to a psychologist.
- Never stoop to his level. Sometimes you really want to answer with the same coin, but in this case you should not. One way or another, in this situation, he is a little liar and gossip, and you are well done.
Sooner or later, the gossip will subside, but the former will come back to haunt him: he whined like a kindergartener and did not come up with anything smarter than how to spread lies about the former.