The modern vocabulary of relationships gave us benching, catfishing, ghosting, paperclipping. And recently, it has been replenished with flibegging, in honor of the famous TV series “Fleabag” (“Fleabag”). What kind of nightmare is this? We will tell you in detail.

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What is flybagging

It sounds very new and fashionable, but everything is much simpler and more prosaic. And each of us at least once, but did it.

Translated from English, this word translates as “to collect fleas”, that is, to constantly meet and get acquainted with people who clearly do not suit you. And according to statistics, it is girls, not guys, who “collect fleas” most often.

Also, flybagging means a vicious circle of parting and reconciliation with a terrible partner.

Why is it called like that

The main character of the series “Fleabag” (“Fleabag”) constantly chooses terrible partners, preferring to choose the worst from a variety of options.

The heroine does not even want to make a choice on her own: she is chosen, and she simply agrees.

What to do with it?

So what do you do if you find yourself in a vicious cycle of choosing terrible partners and guys who aren’t right for you? Everything is both simple and difficult at the same time, because you have to work not only with relationships, but also with yourself.

Understand who attracts you

The first and foremost way to get rid of the toxic tendency to choose bad partners is to understand who attracts you and who you like. Also, who don’t you like? Arm yourself with a pen and paper, write down what features you liked in the former, and in another column what you did not like. Try to be objective, otherwise nothing will work.

And then just use the cheat sheet to understand whether you are making the right choice or not.

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Don’t go twice in the same river

Sometimes you want to resurrect past feelings, return to the former, or at least start communicating with him again. We do not advise you to do this if you do not want to fall into the cabal of terrible relationships and flybagging again. If you feel like you’re constantly finding the wrong partners, it’s not a good idea to go back to one of them.

Don’t give in to nostalgia

The past is remembered by us much more pleasant than it actually was. We do not advise you to succumb to nostalgia and try to “whitewash” former partners. Why did the relationship not work out if everything was so good?

Don’t follow social stereotypes

All around in pairs, and you are alone? This is not a reason to start a relationship anyhow with anyone. Feeling guilty or feeling that you are somehow worse than others is definitely not a reason to start a relationship. Do you want to be happy or something to prove to someone?

Understand your feelings

If you feel that you don’t want a relationship or you just don’t have time, if you feel in a relationship that you are starting to depend on your partner, this is an occasion to go straight to a psychologist and work through your feelings and sensations.

Have you been in such a relationship?