It’s amazing how 24 hours a day and 7 days a week a person lives, eats, breathes, but has almost no contact with himself. It’s like carrying a backpack on your back all your life and not knowing what’s in it. But without an internal connection, it is difficult to find meaning in what we are doing and move forward.

Sometimes not knowing ourselves affects our personality and sense of self-worth. When something serious happens, like we get divorced or we lose our job, we have nowhere to run. Our vital forces leave us, and it becomes more and more difficult to keep in touch with loved ones.

Working on a healthy relationship with yourself always changes life for the better. When we recognize and feel ourselves, we become more resilient and learn to persevere with ups and downs. You can start your journey with a few simple steps.

1. Notice yourself

Often we try to deal with stress by separating our physical selves from our emotional selves. And gradually we dull our feelings so much that we begin to lose ourselves.

Changing this setting is easy. Take a break and ask yourself a few questions:

  • How am I doing?
  • How do I feel physically?
  • What emotions do I experience?

If you’re stuck on a physical or emotional level, try to figure out what exactly is bothering you. Perhaps you are worried about problems at work. Or maybe your back hurts because you haven’t been to the gym for a long time and it’s time to stretch.

This check will take less than 5 minutes. Try to find time to check in with yourself every day. Let it become a kind of ritual. For example, ask yourself these questions every day before breakfast or before bed.

2. Take care of yourself

Think about what type of people you especially like. We are usually attracted to psychologically healthy, happy and interesting people. They make our life better.

Now think about how you feel about yourself. Often, under severe stress or fatigue, a person stops caring for himself, begins to devote time to things that spoil his mood, and distances himself from himself.

You can start caring with simple steps: make the right menu, walk regularly and exercise. Every time it becomes difficult for you to take care of yourself, remind you that you are doing this for your future. If you drop everything right now, the future version of you is unlikely to appreciate it.

3. Follow a conscious ritual

Come up with a method to help you feel in your body. It can take less than 5 minutes, the main thing is not to think about anything and feel yourself at this time.

The easiest way to do this is to set a timer for 5 minutes and breathe deeply. Clear your mind. Every time chaotic thoughts appear, switch your attention to breathing, to how the chest rises and falls.

Another good way is to listen to the beating of the heart. Put your hand on your chest and feel the beat. If thoughts start to come into your head, cut them off and focus back on your heart rate.

4. Be grateful

Try to keep a journal every day or just list a few things you are grateful for. Only it doesn’t have to be things related to other people or luck. Only mention things that are related to you – your personal development, beliefs, or efforts that you put in to do something.

For example, say thank you to your hands for helping you carry heavy shopping bags. Or thank your willpower for allowing you to avoid distractions and finish a difficult work project on time. This approach will make you look at yourself and your life in a new way.